Yourself

It’s definitely accurate to say there’s been better days. Turns out my internet’s gonna be down for the next week, right after I promised to help an online friend out with their assignment. He’s pretty mad at me, understandably. Not much I can do though.

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Yourself.

Realised I was numbering my entries. Seems kinds silly, considering it’s nothing but a string of journal pages. I mean, I’m recording my day here, not a novel.

My sister met a strange individual today. Said he was hitting on all the girls who walked his way, and that he had to be confronted by security before he got his treatment. Too bad my sister’s financial advisor hired female security guards.

But her business has taken quite a sinister turn; I hear she gets more suicidal visitor than before, and not just by a minute amount. They’ve risen by around 250% and that number is only climbing. I just hope she’ll be able to handle them all. Girl puts up with enough as it is.

For me, today was actually kinda fun. Well, except from not being able to play baseball, which kinda ticked me off. But when we got home we played that game Nyx recommended. More competitive than I’d hoped, but gripping. It’s currently updating.

Speaking of whom, Nyx was only on briefly today. Strange of them.

I can only send my sister my wishes, and I have little more to update on today, apart from the fact that I’m losing interest in lions. Thought as much.

Yourself. Pt.5

Interesting how the dumbest of things teach us the most memorable lessons. For instance, go look at some internet memes. I’m pretty confident you’ll actually learn something from them, or at the very least develop some opinions.

This is supposed to be a diary, and I’m giving my non-existent “Future self” advice. Aren’t I supposed to just record my day? It’s still kinda new to me, still feels like I’m just spilling my secrets to some random stranger. But I guess the comfort of writing makes it ok.

I guess the problem is that my life isn’t very interesting. It doesn’t deviate much from that of a ‘normal lifestyle’, if such a thing exists. Eat, sleep, repeat. (No I do not rave. Introverts do not rave, and if they did it would not be information they’d disclose easily.)

Considering nothing interesting happened today, (Thanks baseball.) time to fill the page with uninteresting things about myself.

Currently, my favourite animal is the lion, though these things are subject to change, as I’m rather fickle in that sense. The lion, or lioness, (Sorry, gender equality) relates quite closely to the Sphinx, due to it’s appearance and connotations of wisdom.

I’m not sure how the Sphinx’s riddle was so difficult to solve, perhaps the fear of being killed by it threw people’s minds off the obvious answer. Kinda dumb to write about in my diary, I know. I’m gonna look back on this one day and think:

“What the heck was on my mind? This kid’s an enigma…”

Yourself. Pt.3

I’m not gonna try an intro anymore. Takes up space.

Spoke a little more with Nyx today. Not sure how he did it, but he convinced me to play an RPG. It’s downloading as we speak, and it’s straining my internet, but that’s ok. Free to play can’t be much harm, right?

But they did say something interesting. I asked if they were any good at the game, and the response was:

“Depends who ya play with.”

Struck me a little. Never needed anyone else, I was always fine on my own. How much different can it be here? But enough about me being a nerdy hermit.

Spent some time with the family, though it’s never really an enjoyable time. No-one seems to get along, and we just don’t have enough in common to relate to one another. All we really share is a last name and a bloodline. Heck, maybe not even that.

Nothing really happens when we meet up. It’s just the same old, chat for a bit about whatever comes up, then dissolve to an awkward silence as we all do our business on our phones.

Once again, we feel much more comfortable with people we can’t see. Didn’t realise until today that it cuts as deep as that. Do I really trust online strangers more than my own mother?

Either way, it’s irrelevant. I don’t need any of these people. They just make life a ton easier and more convenient.

I may be about to strike a nerve, so I’m gonna put the pen down again.

Yourself. Pt.2

Dear… Journal? Log? Record? I dunno.

Continued my dull life today. Met a friend on a video game today, by the alias of Nyx. Refuses to tell me anything personal, but seems alright. Gets touchy when I refer to them as a ‘He’ though, but then a lot of male gamers do for the sake of it.

Anyway, I digress.

They told me that I needed to get outside more. Maybe they’re right. But I don’t see it happening anytime soon; I’m like a vampire to social interaction. If it’s not done where I’m comfortable, I’ll shrivel up and burn. Pff. Such a frail flower I am.

Sorry, frail fungus. It’s strange, really. You could be talking to someone you despise in real life and never realise it, becoming the best of friends just cuz you’re hidden by an online alias.

It’s like we have a whole new persona when we’re gaming online. Where we’re judged fairly, and not by looks. Where skill defines us instead of our physical features.

On another, entirely unrelated plane, I actually mustered up the effort to walk to school today. Provided I was texting 75% of the time, but that’s to be worked on another day. Maybe the sky looks better than my phone screen. Maybe it’s polluted by rain clouds.

This is surprisingly easier to do than I thought it would be. It’s quiet at night. I can focus on writing. I’d usually be writing novels or playing some online game, but this gives me something… productive? I guess? to do. Feels like I’m doing something worth my time.

Eyes are weary. Gonna rest my pen for now. Until tomorrow.